Emotions aren’t as they seem.
Emotions are energy. Emotions shape our world, our reality, our life. They are there to assist you and help you to feel a certain way when an event occurs and as you go throughout your day.
There are more emotions to feel then we realise, yet we often only use the same emotions over and over; happy, sad, angry, frustrated, annoyed, pleased, excited, neutral. This is pretty much the list of emotions we engage in on a daily or weekly basis.
But here’s the thing, emotions are our choice. Emotions are something we are taught to do, to feel, to experience, and often we only know and engage in a small number of emotions, which means this is how we often feel and this is where we stay.
Ever wondered why 2 people can experience the same thing, and one person can be a little annoyed and another can be furious?
Well, it is the way they respond to the event that causes them to feel this way.
There is a theory or this called E+R=O; Event + Response = Outcome (I learnt this from TCI, not sure where it comes from).
What this means is, it is not the event that causes how we feel, or the outcome it is our response to the event that influences the outcomes.
Whilst we can’t always control the event, we can certainly control our response, which in return affects the outcome.
Now before you tell me there is no way you could feel anything but furious when your partner is late for dinner, or that feeling annoyed about the extra meeting that has occurred this week is the only appropriate response, I want you to ask yourself, is this the only way to feel? And, would everyone else feel the same as you? The answer to both of these questions is no.
People choose to feel differently all the time, even about the same situation. The power in this is, those who understand that emotion and feeling is a choice, have more control over their lives, and essentially allow more positivity and happiness to be part of their day.
Because these people know being frustrated, annoyed or furious at something that was out of their control is a waste of their energy, and actually gets them o where.
Now don’t get me wrong, yes it can be annoying when your partner is later for dinner, and an extra meeting can be frustrating too, but it doesn’t mean you have to take in this emotion and carry it with you into other areas of your life.
So what do you do the?
Well, when an event happens, ask yourself how you feel, acknowledge your first emotion, but ask yourself, is it worth me feeling this way? (the answer is probably no), how else could I choose to feel? What would this mean? How would this make me feel instead? How would things be different?
Try this, try choosing different emotions.
You can choose your emotion, you can choose how you feel. You can choose to be positive and happy.